G-CEEVEZR398 Episode 2: How to Go From Disconnected Roommates to Connected Partners - Play Dates for Couples

Episode 2

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Published on:

15th Dec 2025

Episode 2: How to Go From Disconnected Roommates to Connected Partners

In this episode, I talk about how to transform your relationship from feeling like disconnected roommates to connected romantic partners. 

I introduce five key areas that are essential for this transformation, all starting with the letter C: 

  1. Core Identity.
  2. Couple Identity.
  3. Communication.
  4. Connection.
  5. Conditioning & Circumstance Shifts. 

I expand on each area a bit, giving you insights on what it takes to incorporate them into your relationship. 

To discover which area is your greatest strength right now and which one is your biggest area of need, take the connected relationship assessment at playdatesforcouples.com/assessment.  

Tune in to the next episodes for practical advice and actionable steps to revive intimacy and connection with your partner.

Transcript

If you feel more like disconnected roommates than connected romantic partners, and if you want to change that, keep listening because I'm going to show you exactly how to do that.

Hey, if we haven't met yet, I'm Leanne and I'm an intimacy and relationship coach. I love creating content about date nights (or what I call play dates), connection and communication to help you go from feeling like disconnected roommates to connected romantic partners again and to help you bring fun and play into your relationship.

So let's dig deeper into that and go through five areas that are all needed in order to help you move from disconnected to connected in your relationship. And they all start with the letter C.

So the first one is core identity and this is all about discovering or clarifying who you uniquely are as an individual. And this includes all kinds of things like your desires, fantasies, orientation, gender identity, values as an individual, your personal vision for your life, your personality type, your play type even, your needs, your abilities and also your religious or spiritual beliefs.

The second piece is couple identity. So this is all about discovering or clarifying who you and your partner are uniquely as a couple and how your individual identities interact. And this also includes many things like your vision for your relationship and your vision together for life as a couple, your mission, your goals, your values as a couple (which interestingly can be different than your values as an individual), your patterns, your attachment styles, your communication styles, boundaries, your personality interactions and again, your religious or spiritual beliefs together.

The third piece is communication. So this is all about communicating and also expressing who you are and it includes things like emotional intelligence (and this one's huge), consent (also, really significant),communication methods, communication skills, the cycle of communication, fun ways to start and have a conversation, why communication is so hard and what good communication even is.

The fourth piece is connection. So this is all about intentionally creating connection and intimacy through things like play dates or date nights, simple connection points, connection meetings and different types of intimacy like emotional and physical.

And the fifth piece is conditioning and circumstance shifts. So this is all about the foundation underneath it all and shifting the things that get in the way of connection and that get in the way of you knowing and expressing who you are. So it includes things like awareness of societal conditioning, awareness of the language that goes on in your head, limiting beliefs, fear, shame, reactivity, what mindset actually is ... because what is often out there really isn't mindset in the way that I see it ... so things like affirmations, right? Those are just surface tactics that don't actually change things underneath unless you're also doing them in conjunction with the deeper work. It also includes the mindset process and mindset tools that actually work to shift things.

If you'd like to know which of these areas is your greatest strength right now and which one is your greatest area of need, you can take the connected relationship assessment and you can do that at playdatesforcouples.com/assessment. And that link will also be in the show notes as well.

It's essential for you to have all five areas because it's not about isolated tactics or surface solutions that aren't really solutions. If you listened to episode one about my story, you will have heard me talk about that in a very practical and personal way. So if you didn't listen to that one yet, go back and listen.

And check out the next episode for three steps to come up with fun date night ideas to help you with the C of connection, because most couples are bored with date nights and don't have any ideas about what they could do.

And follow the podcast so you don't miss any upcoming episodes to help you create an awesome relationship with your partner. Thanks for listening and see you in the next one!

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About the Podcast

Play Dates for Couples
Create the deeper connection you want in your relationship through fun play dates!
Can you relate to being a busy couple who’s feeling more like disconnected roommates than connected, romantic partners? Life kinda took over and your relationship fell to the bottom of the priorities list. You just want the connection back but you’re too busy and you’re either stuck in a rut with the same-old, same-old or you do nothing for date nights or couple connection time.

The truth is that creating connection in your relationship does take being intentional but it can be done in fun and simple ways, through play. Date nights don’t have to involve a ton of time outside the home, or a ton of effort, and they don’t need to be boring. They can be play dates!

So, tune in to the Play Dates for Couples podcast to get fun and simple ideas that will help you get that connection back in your relationship. Episodes are released every Monday morning and you can listen on the go.

You can expect a mix of interviews and solo episodes (but mostly solos) with everything from behind-the-scenes looks at real couples’ date nights (rather, play dates!), to simple ideas for connection that work in your busy life, to foundational shifts and essentials for effective communication in your relationship.

And, hey! I’m Leanne Chesser, intimacy and relationship coach, and I help couples (or individuals) in long-term relationships get the connection and spark back (and keep it), especially through play.

Let’s connect!
Website: https://playdatesforcouples.com
Instagram: http://instagram.com/leannechesser
YouTube: https://youtube.com/@playdatesforcouples

If you have any questions or want to be considered as a guest on the show, you can email me at leanne@playdatesforcouples.com.

About your host

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Leanne Chesser

Hi, I'm Leanne and I'm an intimacy and relationship coach. I'm the creator of Connection for Couples and Play Dates for Couples as well as The Connected Relationship Method, which I use to help couples go from feeling like disconnected roommates to connected, romantic partners again. Many couples feel bored with their date nights and couple connection time (or don't have these things at all), so one way I help them create connection is through adding more fun and play into their date nights! Tune into the podcast for simple, fun ideas date night ideas (and real talk about my actual play dates) so you can create the connection you want in your relationship!